Tears

"Tears are the safety valve of the heart when too much pressure is laid on it." ~Albert Smith

AND

"I like the snot to run a little, the tears to accumulate a bit before reaching for the handkerchief. Then I know I'm really crying. Crying just isn't crying unless it's messy." ~D.H. Mondfleur

Tonight...
I am thankful for tears.
Most notably, MY tears.
I try to make it a point to cry at least every other day.
As nana always said, "Better out than than in."
But this summer, meeting that goal has been surprisingly harder than usual.

I'm typically not a picky crier.

Crying for any reason is generally fine.

There are the fool-proof fall-backs of course: heartbreak, my parents divorce, rejection, lonliness, self-loathing, and self-pity. Then there are the unexpected public instigators: long lines at the gas station, no parking places at the book store, an elderly couple tieing each other's shoes at the beach, The Fray comes on the radio, a humingbird hovers within inches of your face while you lay on the hammock... you accidently wash your favorite new shirt that clearly stated: DRY CLEAN ONLY.
And lastly (though certainly no less legitimate), the all mighty, I'm-crying-and-I'm-crying-TONIGHT-god-damnit: anything to start the flood... light candles, play that trusty Sarah McLaughlin song over and over and over and over again... then play it again, only this time in the DARK. Look through old photos, read dusty journals, look him up on myspace. Drink red wine. Watch The Notebook.

Today's tears can be most closely characterized as a Class Two Tear Torrent. Somehow, I don't really think that going to see Pixar's animated, Ratatouille, quite qualifies as a self-loathing or optimistic flood inducing move.
I was just looking for a good time on a Sunday afternoon. Minding my own business. On my way to see a cute flick about a precious mouse with a passion for the culinary arts.

WRONG.

Turns out, what you get is an adorable rat who could turn even Hitler into a puddle with his big, expressive eyes... who gets separated from his family and subsequently battles monstruous adversity, trapped between two worlds, neither of which he belongs in... needless to say, Pixar had me by the hankie at "hello".

But really. Ratatouille. Great movie. Not a tear-jerker at all I'm sorry to say. I just happen to be an incredibly suppressed, emotional wreck at the moment.
But hey, better out than in, right?